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Feedback that Sucks!

I cringe when I hear, “we’ve got a culture of fearless feedback”. But I love to hear “we’ve got a culture of feedback and praise, with careful delivery”. It’s often very transparent what the motive of a person delivering feedback is. And motive counts, a lot!

Have you ever received feedback that makes you want to curl up and ignore the world?


The right motive is to want to improve outcomes for the company and also for the recipient. The wrong motive is to point score or to make yourself seem better at the other person’s expense.


So, your motive is pure, what now? To give feedback that will be well received, you need to have two foundations in place. Firstly, a culture of praise. People need to hear, often, what you value about them to be open to receiving critical feedback. Research suggests 5 times more praise than criticism. Second, you need to adapt your delivery to the psychological makeup of the recipient. Does that person like a frank delivery, or are they more open if it’s delivered diplomatically, with warmth and empathy?


To get the behavioural change you desire by giving feedback, it’s up to you to set the environment (praise often) and tweak the delivery for each person. This way, they will know your motive is pure and are more likely to take that feedback on board and change.

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